Message to my offspring:

I'm in charge and  I'm trying to train you to be a tolerable adult therefore I will be unable to up with your sh#$.  Meltdowns, temper tantrums, and sassy backtalk are outlawed.  If you get away with it now, you may think it's acceptable as an adult and the world has met it's quota for jackwaggons.  So.....I will be taking no names, you will not pass go,  and there will be no warning for this train.  You should also think long and hard before you come at me cause I haven't slept in days and I will take you out!!!!! Thank you and you're welcome!

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