12 worst gifts for children
Here is my special list just in time for Christmas...
Disclaimer: This is from a parent standpoint. The kids all love and ask for these things. Some of them I refer to as 'kid crack'.
1. Moon sand---Seeing the immanent danger I immediately relegated this to an outside toy. Unfortunately, ours was hot pink and the kids patched the cracks in our driveway with it. It stayed that way for months.
2. Finger paints---Teaching your kids to paint with their fingers, I feel, sends the wrong message. P.S. Blue is not washable no matter what it says on the bottle.
3. Playdoh paraphernalia---Playdoh itself is debatable among parents but the 'sets' (aka ice cream station/BBQ station) are creations of the devil. Fun the first time but then the playdoh gets in all the crevices, hardens and blocks them up. They should come with special tools like a miniature ice pic.
4. Polly pockets---I once bought into the Polly pocket thing but after awhile you learn that Polly is a slob and she scatters her little accessories everywhere. I doubt she even needs an evening purse!
5. Bath crayons---Baths are for getting clean. Thanks a lot Crayola! Don't get me started on your color bubbles. Bastards!
6. Make-up & hair paint---I did get some make-up for the playing dress-up thing, but then I learned they will ask for it all the time and need to be supervised unless you want your bathroom painted in it. Believe me, you will rue the day you let that stuff into the house. They will also ask if they can wear it to school. Um, you're seven and have a mother who loves you, so no. Hair paint??? You're kidding right??? Like I need to make more work for myself.
7. Monster High dolls--Anorexic vampire sluts. Ya that's a great role model/toy for my child.
8. Doodle buddy--washable my ass, why didn't I just hand my kid a sharpie.
9. Sharp swords. If it looks like a weapon and feels like a weapon, guess what....you got it! It is used as a weapon! I actually broke one of these cheep things over my knee one time and found it very gratifying.
10. Balloons---Kids love them, fight over them and beat each other with them. They float all over your house never having a home and never going away. Whoever thought to put a rubber band on the end of a giant one is an evil genius. The upside is they are great for negative behavior modification. What?! You hit your sister?! Pop.
11. Orbeez---If you have small children they will eat them however I'm pretty sure they're non-toxic...Be careful not to spill cause they go everywhere. Interesting fact: When you step on them they turn to gel. Sounds awesome right?! Oh and I've just seen they've come out with an Orbeez foot spa. No chance!
12. Glitter. I've heard this referred to as 'the herpes of the art world' because you can scrub and scrub but it's never going away and I feel this a very true statement. Included are those tiny tubes of glitter glue that the kids need you to open because they are individually blocked and then they have so little in them anyways. Not worth it!
Not on this list and up for debate are all electronics which is for sure the number one 'kid crack' as they all just need 'five more minutes'. I don't feel that they are bad but limiting is difficult. They will forever be bartering for their beloved device. So...I feel the longer you can hold off the better but I'm making no judgments because I know what's like to 'just need a minute'.
Happy Holidays!
Disclaimer: This is from a parent standpoint. The kids all love and ask for these things. Some of them I refer to as 'kid crack'.
1. Moon sand---Seeing the immanent danger I immediately relegated this to an outside toy. Unfortunately, ours was hot pink and the kids patched the cracks in our driveway with it. It stayed that way for months.
2. Finger paints---Teaching your kids to paint with their fingers, I feel, sends the wrong message. P.S. Blue is not washable no matter what it says on the bottle.
3. Playdoh paraphernalia---Playdoh itself is debatable among parents but the 'sets' (aka ice cream station/BBQ station) are creations of the devil. Fun the first time but then the playdoh gets in all the crevices, hardens and blocks them up. They should come with special tools like a miniature ice pic.
4. Polly pockets---I once bought into the Polly pocket thing but after awhile you learn that Polly is a slob and she scatters her little accessories everywhere. I doubt she even needs an evening purse!
5. Bath crayons---Baths are for getting clean. Thanks a lot Crayola! Don't get me started on your color bubbles. Bastards!
6. Make-up & hair paint---I did get some make-up for the playing dress-up thing, but then I learned they will ask for it all the time and need to be supervised unless you want your bathroom painted in it. Believe me, you will rue the day you let that stuff into the house. They will also ask if they can wear it to school. Um, you're seven and have a mother who loves you, so no. Hair paint??? You're kidding right??? Like I need to make more work for myself.
7. Monster High dolls--Anorexic vampire sluts. Ya that's a great role model/toy for my child.
8. Doodle buddy--washable my ass, why didn't I just hand my kid a sharpie.
9. Sharp swords. If it looks like a weapon and feels like a weapon, guess what....you got it! It is used as a weapon! I actually broke one of these cheep things over my knee one time and found it very gratifying.
10. Balloons---Kids love them, fight over them and beat each other with them. They float all over your house never having a home and never going away. Whoever thought to put a rubber band on the end of a giant one is an evil genius. The upside is they are great for negative behavior modification. What?! You hit your sister?! Pop.
11. Orbeez---If you have small children they will eat them however I'm pretty sure they're non-toxic...Be careful not to spill cause they go everywhere. Interesting fact: When you step on them they turn to gel. Sounds awesome right?! Oh and I've just seen they've come out with an Orbeez foot spa. No chance!
12. Glitter. I've heard this referred to as 'the herpes of the art world' because you can scrub and scrub but it's never going away and I feel this a very true statement. Included are those tiny tubes of glitter glue that the kids need you to open because they are individually blocked and then they have so little in them anyways. Not worth it!
Not on this list and up for debate are all electronics which is for sure the number one 'kid crack' as they all just need 'five more minutes'. I don't feel that they are bad but limiting is difficult. They will forever be bartering for their beloved device. So...I feel the longer you can hold off the better but I'm making no judgments because I know what's like to 'just need a minute'.
Happy Holidays!
So true for a lot of them,HATE play dough....gets everywhere,even the homemade stuff. And don't get me started on make up !!! Gemma's quite responsible with it but Jaime ( aka one of your triplets) sigh.....I never knew you could put on lipstick in so many places !!
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